Our Experience at Getting Passports

Our first attempt ever at getting passports was December 23. That's right, December 23- a Saturday - the Saturday before Christmas. We live in a small midwestern town where the post office was closing at 1 pm that day. I got out while hubby stayed in the car with the children. If we had to fill out applications, we certainly wanted to do that in the car while the children could be entertained with a dvd, rather than in the post office where they would amuse themselves with all sorts of getting into things they weren't supposed to, and bothering each other very loudly in sight of all the patrons.

So, yours truly ventured into the post office at around 11 am on said Saturday to get the information on passports. The line was rather short, which was a good thing since there were only 2 employees working behind the counter that day. I went to the passport line. I was greeeted by a kind man, even if he was a bit, shall we say, small town (read: redneck - hope that doesn't offend!). I asked the kind man about the passports and he gave me the forms to fill out. I then inquired about fees and such, implying that we would need the passports expedited.

To quote the man, "Oooooohhhh, that's gonna cost ya."

My reply, "Thank you, sir. We're aware that it will be costly, but we are needing them quickly."

Then, I made my most grievous mistake -- I implied to the man that we were intending on applying for the passports that very day and would need photos taken there, as the last place we went to get photos did not seem to have a camera that would properly fit children. After the kind gentleman recovered from his shock and disgust that we desired to get the passports right then, two hours from his Christmas vacation break, he then proceeded to give me all the explanations as to why we did NOT want to apply for the passports that day, saying things such as, "There are only two of us working today." "The line's gonna be all the way out the door." And other such things. It was quite an experience. I want to add that this experience wasn't rude, just comical. In no way am I trying to disrespect the postman.

I'm sure I'll miss these kinds of exchanges between myself and other midwestern kinds-of- folks (of which I'm one). My next bureaucratic exchanges will undoubtedly have a more high-brow, English, sort of tone. I'm sure this experience will continue be interesting.

Stay tuned for our other exciting adventures!

It's Official

Posted in our family life
Well, hubby accepted the temporary position in London, England. We'll be leaving mid-January. This has all happened very quickly. We're big home-bodies, so it will definitely stretch us. We are very excited about the opportunity for our family and for hubby, career-wise. Please pray for us as we plan, pack and leave in a very quick fashion. Please stop by for some short update posts as the days progress. I hope to be posting more regularly, but the posts will probably be shorter.

Big, Big Stuff

Please bear with me as my posts are few and far between. Not only is it the Christmas season and my daughter's fourth birthday, but our family is considering a temporary overseas assignment with his company. It would happen very quickly. We would sure appreciate your prayers! I will be planning to post details soon of our plans. Merry Christmas, everyone! Oh, and a new devotion of mine is up on our church website in case you're interested.

Christmas Busyness

I haven't been around much this week. Three things...I've been waiting for homeschoolblogger to get back up to speed since the upgrades; I've been sick with a sinus infection and bronchitis; and I've been working on finishing some Christmas projects, including some devotions (Here's one. I'll post the other one when it gets up on the site.) for our church website. I've also been doing what so many of you I'm sure have -- wrapping, buying, and baking. This is a busy time of the year! So, stick with me as my posts are slimmer. I'll soon be posting more regularly again. Sometime this weekend, I plan to post my favorite way that we're keeping Christ the central part of the season this year. Stay tuned.

December's DIVINE Lines

December's issue of DIVINE Lines, our church's women's newsletter is out. To view it, go here. My column is entitled His Name Famous and this month, I continue with my series on the paralytic from Luke 5. The focus of the article is trusting Jesus and believing Him, as the friends did in the story of the paralytic. Enjoy.

Response of Contentment

No matter how many times I read the story in Luke of Mary's visit from Gabriel, I never cease to be amazed by Mary's response. She's just been told that she's going to be giving birth to God's Son. She's not yet married. She's probably very young. Her response? "Be it unto my according to your word." She doesn't complain, question, or throw a fit. She simply says, "Let it be so."

I reread the story again yesterday and thought about my usual response to God, especially if He seems to be giving me a hard task, or something that doesn't make any earthly sense. I definitely don't react the way that Mary did. I more question Him, become angry or pouty with him, or just plain out disobey him. Again, I'll just say, in light of the way I usually respond, I am in awe of our Lord's mother.

I wonder what it would take for me to have a "Mary response"? When a difficult thing arises, when dying to myself is something that comes around again and again (I'm a mom, remember?), when I'm called to forigve a deep hurt, could I respond with such grace, such contentment as Mary? I'm trying to let these words sink deep into my heart and soul so that maybe, just maybe, one day, I can respond to whatever Jesus calls me to do, "Be it unto me according to your word."

Starvin' in My Heart

One recent morning, DD3 told me she absolutely could wait no longer for me to get out of bed. She was as she put it, "starvin' in her mouth!" I thought it was cute at the time. But since I have been trying to listen to God throughout my day (not just in my morning quiet time), and especially through my children, I pondered it many times as I went about my day.



Finally, at about 3 that afternoon, I felt God speaking to me more about what she had said. I thought about my own starving. My starving heart. So many times, I try to fill my heart through my mouth, or through my accomplishments, or through other people's compliments to me, or through my stuff. But my starving heart can only be satisfied by my heart's Creator. He satisfies with "living water" (John 4:14) and He always "tastes good" (Ps 34:8)



Lord, please fill me. I'm starvin' in my heart.

Downpour Report

Well, the Downpour conference this past weekend was great, but not necessarily in the way that I expected. It certainly wasn't a feel-good Christian conference, with lots of things to make you laugh and pat yourself on the back for when you left. (Not exactly my own desire, but one I've certainly noticed at other conferences.) In fact, I left on Friday evening with a very somber feeling. The theme of the conference is personal revival. The theme verse of the weekend was Hosea 6:3:



"Let us know,

Let us press on to know the Lord.

His going forth is as certain as the dawn.

He will come to us like the rain,

Like the spring rains watering the earth."



The five key talks were



*God on the Throne - A Picture of Holiness (James MacDonald)

*Sin in the Mirror - A Picture of Brokeness (Beth Moore)

*Face in the Dirt - A Picture of Repentance (James MacDonald)

*Christ on the Cross - A Picture of Grace (Joe Stowell)

*Spirit in Control - A Picture of Power (Crawford Loritts).



Friday evening's theme was "God on the Throne" presented by James MacDonald. He started with the key verse for the weekend, Hosea 6:3. He reminded us that in our pressing on to know God, we must realize that He is holy. The worship focused on the holiness of God, with purposefully chosen songs on this theme, as well as excellent visual representations. Pastor McDonald's theme was simple: We have forgotten the holiness of God. I was hit squarely between the eyes.



He quoted from Isaiah 6. As he did, I pictured with Isaiah the LORD high and lifted up on his throne, with the train of His robe literally filling the temple. A pertinent illustration that Pastor MacDonald used to illustrate the train of His robe, was a description of a bride on her wedding day. Clearly a train is to call attention to the bride, that it's her day. He also described Queen Elizabeth's train at her coronation, telling us how the train of her robe was literally trailing out of the church it was so long. Only a queen would deserve such a lengthy train. Then, Pastor MacDonald asked each of us to picture a train that literally filled the entire temple, back and forth, back and forth, draping, flowing, piling up to the very top of the temple. What a picture of God's splendor!



He used other scriptures to highlight what God looks from those in scripture who saw Him, and recorded their visions, such as Ezekiel, Daniel, and John. From Ezekiel 1:26-28, we learned that holiness describes separation. The train of his robe is a symbol of this separation. From Revelation 20:11, we learned that holiness demands caution. We were reminded the the seraph who attend Him cover their eyes and their feet, not ever gazing upon Him directly. That rightly seen, holiness only makes one want to hide. From Revelation 4:11, we learned that holiness declares glory. The cries from those in God's presence were, "Holy, Holy, Holy" and scripture also declares that the whole earth is full of His glory. And from Daniel 7 and Revelation 10: 4-7, we learned that holiness determines mystery. The books described in these chapters will be opened one day to full revelation. Until then, God keeps them a mystery. We can never plumb the depths of His wisdom.



James MacDonald, who I frequently listen to on the Moody Broadcast Network, is an animated, humorous speaker normally. This night too, he was humorous. But not purposely so. When his natural inclination to be funny came out, MacDonald respectfully reminded the crowd of the weightiness of the topic. Indeed, the awesome holiness of God is no laughing matter.



One of my favorite of his points was that we like to think of God's foundational characteristic as love. He contended that it's holiness. Love came only after the demand for a price for our unrighteousness in contrast to His holiness.



So, Friday evening, I left with a sense, a weighty feeling of this holiness, this extreme otherness that is our God. And I was humbled, to say the least. God on the throne was forefront on my mind as I prepared to hear what Saturday would bring.



Tomorrow, I'll share more about the sessions entitled "Sin in the Mirror" and "Face in the Dirt".

Downpour

Hubby and I are off this weekend to attend the Downpour revival, with James McDonald, Joe Stowell, Beth Moore and Crawford Lorritts. We're going with three other couples. We're really looking forward to it.



This will be the first time I've ever attended anything like this with my husband, I think. Usually, I go to see Beth Moore every summer with my friends. I love her teaching so much, and am always quoting her to hubby, so I thought this might be a "man-friendly" way for him to hear her. I'm really looking forward to hearing the others as well.



I'm praying for a personal revival in my own heart, a personal hunger and thirst for His Word and righteousness.



Maybe I'll post more next week about what happened.

The Need for Understanding

Apr. 27, 2006
The Need for Understanding


I long for understanding. I want my husband to know exactly how it feels to listen to two preschoolers argue at decibel levels that would challenge a B-52 bomber, while at the same time making dinner as a screaming toddler clings to you as if you're the hook to her loop! I want my friends to understand my ridiculously crazy schedule and still be my friend even though I can't call or regularly attend girls nights out. I want my younger girlfriends who have a perfect family of four, with children spaced perfectly 3 years apart, to understand what my life is like with a 4,3, and 1 year old, with a mom who is 36 years old, and not the lovely and high-energy 29!





What I've learned in this journey of life, especially after becoming a mother is this: my exact life will never be fully understood by another human being. Never. I shared this with my friend Kelly once as she lamented the fact that her husband was in charge of their new baby all day, and had decided to do the "I'll take him to see grandma" thing that seems so popular with my husband and those of my friends as well. "I just want him to understand what I go through every day. What my life at home with a cranky and discontent baby is really like."



"Dream on, sister," I told her.



No really, I said, "Sweet girl, he'll never understand."



You know how I learned this? From experience. No matter how martyr-like my attitude, no matter how many anecdotes, complaints, or words I use to describe my day to him, my sweet husband who goes off to work everyday will never understand the life of a stay at home, homeschooling, ministry-leading mom. Nor will any of my friends, my children, my mentor, or my own mother for that matter.



I used to get angry about this. I would lament loudly to God in my prayers about this need I had for understanding. My journal during my first few years of motherhood reads like a veritable martyr-manual. "Woe is me. Will this baby ever stop crying. Does anyone, ahem, UNDERSTAND, how hard this is?"



One of my more thoughtful friends, Jen, pointed out to me one day in her very gentle way, that my need for understanding had the potential to be an idol. Potential schmotential, it clearly already was an idol, because an idol is just an exalted thought in your mind. Clearly for me the need for understanding had become more important in some ways than God and what He had to speak to me during these difficult times.



To summarize my learning to this point then, I had become aware that no human being could fully understand my exact life. I had become aware that my need for understanding had become so important in my mind that it had indeed eclipsed my relationship with God. Fast forward two years...



I mentioned in a previous post that I had been meditating on Mark 1 and had come to the point in verse 45 where it says they (the crowds) came at Jesus from every direction. Even in the deserted places. Boom. There it was. Understanding. Finally, someOne who who understood what it was to be pulled in every direction.



Once again, Jesus met me right at the point of my need. Came into my life personally as a God who understands. And knowing that has made me more passionate about Him than ever. He truly is a God who meets all my needs. He is a jealous God, a God who will only allow Himself to truly fill those empty places. In Him, I have all that I need, and indeed He understands.

Slow Rat

As my friend April says, I'm a slow rat. You know, the kind that keep hitting their head against the wall in the Skinner maze? That's me alright. The slow rat. It sometimes takes a while for me to catch on to what God is trying to say to me.



Right now I think it's listen, be aware, pay attention.



"There is ecstasy in paying attention." -Anne Lamott

As I look back over my blog entries, I see that so many of them are about this paying attention, this listening. I think about my last entry where I really watched and listened, really paid attention to my daughter. There was ecstasy in that. Seeing her joy in life, her unattempted relaxation, her freedom thrilled my soul and opened me up to a childlikeness in my own. Ecstasy indeed.

The Wisdom of Childhood

"You'll teach me of hearts and dreams

And all the most important things

And all that I have lost along the way

And I can't wait."



These words from a Sara Groves song echo my very own feelings about all my children, but especially DD3. I am ever amazed at that child's wonder, her natural curiosity. I find myself wanting to study her, wanting to reach back to that time in my life and really remember when I was so innocent, so curious, so pure. I long to go back to a time when dandelions were beautiful flowers and worms seemed like scary snakes. When I noticed the beauty in a sunset and took the time to thank God for roses.



In these ways and so many more she does remind me of all that I have "lost along the way". I'm humbled by the wisdom of her childhood. The kind of wisdom that says slow down, notice, enjoy, dance, laugh, play, get dirty.



My eyes well up with tears as I think about her losing that innocence, that childhood wisdom. I pray that somehow, God always keeps a little piece of it deep down inside her soul. And inside mine.

Loud Birds

The bird was going crazy in a bush chirping away, over and over again, as I walked into my usual writing and getaway place. "That bird is loud," I thought to myself as I walked by. Then, I noticed another woman that was walking by the same bush, the same loud bird. She seemingly took no notice. What was she thinking about? How could she not hear that shrieking?



How many times am I like that I wonder? How often do I miss the still small voice, or even the loud chirping of one of God's creation trying to get my attention? I'm so often in my own little world of busyness, activity, getting to the next thing. How often do I go about my tasks, routines, and daily duties without even thinking about spiritual matters or God at all?



I read about Brother Lawrence glorifying God as he did the dishes, and I'm humbled. Usually, my most routine tasks bother me the most. The dishes, laundry, diapers. The tasks that are done, only to be needing to be done again. And again. And again.



God, wake me up to your presence in the mundane. Chirp loudly. My awareness is dim.

Mark 1 and 2

In preparing for an upcoming Bible study, I have been spending time in Mark this afternoon. I was meditating on the first verse of Mark 2.



"And again He entered Capernaum after some days, and it was heard that He was in the house."



I pondered that verse for a while. Then, to gain contextual information, I went back to the previous two verses and read:



"and (Jesus)said to him (the cleansed leper), 'see that you say nothing to anyone; but go your way, show yourself to the priest, and offer for your cleansing those things which Moses commanded, as a testimony to them.' However, he went out and began to proclaim it freely, and to spread the matter, so that Jesus could not longer openly enter the city, but was outside in deserted places; and they came to Him from every direction."



I reflected on the phrase "it was heard" from Mark 2:1. People were talking about Him, dying to get to Him, clamoring for Him to meet their very real needs. What was Jesus' reaction? I wondered how he felt having come back from the deserted places mentioned in chapter 1 v. 45. Was He like me after I've gotten back from a short respite? Longing to go back to where people don't clamor for me, no one needs their shoes tied, or their nose wiped? Was He longing to go back to the deserted places where the needs were not so great?



Then, I noticed it...the last part of the last verse in chapter 1..."and they came to Him from every direction." Even in the deserted places, people came to Jesus from every direction. I feel like that sometimes. People need me. My husband needs me, my children need me, my friends need me, and my ministry team needs me. Sometimes it feels like they come at me from every direction. The needs are endless.



But what I drew comfort from here is that even in the deserted places, Jesus was found. I am comforted by the fact that He knew that feeling of clamoring, even in the deserted places. I'm comforted to know that Jesus sees my longing to go with Him to the deserted places, yet sometimes my children, or others, won't cooperate. I love that He understands, that He knows how I feel.



It's hard to get away to the deserted places when you're a mom and a wife and a ministry leader. But that won't stop me from trying. Being in the deserted places with Jesus is worth it.

Reading

My sweet dd3 is doing reading by imitation, which I love. She loves to read "I Know an Old Lady Who Swallowed a Fly" (My favorite line is " 'haps she'll die!) and just today read "Go, Dog, Go". Now I know Charlotte Mason would say both of those books were probably twaddle, but my children love their silliness, and because of that silliness they enjoy reading, so we'll keep using them, as well as the non-twaddly classics!



My son on the other hand is starting to recognize some words, and one-to-one corrsepondence as he reads, so he is really on the road to reading. He enjoys reading board books to his baby sister and usually tries really hard to match up his fingers to the words. He is also beginning to notice beginning sounds and letters, so sometimes corrects himself as he's reading if he notices that something wasn't quite right. I know from Reading Recovery training that I took as a public school teacher, that these are all good signs for beginning readers, so I am so excited for him.



My baby dd14 mo. loves Bingo. When asked to go choose a book for story time, she always toddles away to find Bingo. Today she did choose a Maisy story (Where Does Maisy Live?) as well. We love Maisy! This one is especially cute for toddlers because it has lots of flaps to open.



It seems to me that all this reading and a house littered up with books seems to be paying off! Whew!